How to Build a Meaningful and Stress Free Family Shot List for Your Wedding

One of the most important (but often overlooked) parts of wedding planning is preparing your family photo list. This list ensures that no one gets missed, emotional moments aren't rushed, and your timeline flows beautifully. It also helps me, as your photographer, organize and direct this part of the day with calm confidence—so you don’t have to.

In this post, I’ll walk you through exactly what to include in your family shot list, why it matters, how much time to plan for, and how to set everyone up for success!

What to Include in Your Family Shot List

When building your list, start with immediate family, then expand as needed. Write the list with both people’s names and their relationship—it makes the process smoother and eliminates any confusion on the day of.

Here’s an example format you can follow for each partner:

Partner A (Emmy)

• Emmy + Mom (Sherry)

• Emmy + Dad (Dave)

• Emmy + Mom + Dad

• Emmy + Luke + Mom + Dad

• Emmy + David (Brother)

• Emmy + Luke + David

• Emmy + Grandma (Linda)

• Emmy + Grandpa (Ed)

• Emmy + Mom + Grandma

• Emmy + Mom + Dad + Siblings + Spouses

Partner B (Luke)

• Luke + Mom (Carla)

• Luke + Dad (Michael)

• Luke + Mom + Dad

• Luke + Emmy + Mom + Dad

• Luke + Siblings (Jake + Sarah)

• Luke + Grandma (Susan)

• Luke + Grandpa (George)

• Luke + Mom + Dad + Siblings + Spouses

Combined Family Groupings

• Emmy + Luke + both sets of parents

• Emmy + Luke + all siblings

• Emmy + Luke + all parents + siblings

• Emmy + Luke + grandparents (if together or separately as needed)

• Emmy + Luke + full immediate families (group photo)

Optional (If Time Allows):

• Emmy + Aunt (Janice) + Uncle (Mark)

• Luke + Cousins

• Emmy + Luke + Godparents

• Group with family friends or chosen family

Pro tip: Prioritize the groupings you know you’ll want framed or included in your album. If you don’t envision printing a photo with a specific group, it may not be necessary to add it to this portion of the timeline.

How Much Time Should You Set Aside for Family Photos?

A good rule of thumb is to plan for 2–4 minutes per photo grouping. That may not sound like much, but it adds up fast.

• Immediate family block: usually takes 25–30 minutes

• Extended family block: another 20–30 minutes

If you have a lot of combinations or a large extended family, we can always build in extra time or shift less-urgent groupings to the reception.

Prioritize the groupings that will matter to you in 10+ years. Not every combo is essential—focus on the images that tell your story and reflect your relationships.

Assign a "Go-Getter"

Something that I’ve found incredibly helpful is to have someone in the family of a close friend who knows everyone, nearby and available and willing to be the go-getter. And letting them know about this ahead of time. Designate one person from each side of the family who knows everyone and can help round people up as needed! This person should:

• Know the key players (so I don’t have to shout "Uncle Jeff?")

• Help track down stragglers

• Run over to cocktail hour if someone is missing

This makes everything more efficient and keeps the energy high! My goal with this portion of the day is for it to be efficient and smooth, because while I do my best to make them enjoyable- I know your cocktail hour and reception are going to be a lot more fun and I want you to get to that part of the day as quickly as possible!

Consider the Flow and Location

If we’re doing family photos after the ceremony, let’s find a location slightly separated from cocktail hour. This helps:

• Keep guests from drifting into the background

• Maintain focus so we finish faster

• Get you to your party sooner!

I’ll always scout the location ahead of time and guide you to a spot with great light, a clean background, and minimal distractions.

Remember: You Have the Reception for More Photos!

You don’t need a formal photo with every single guest during family portraits. Instead:

• Focus your list on those closest to you

• Let me know if you want reception candids with certain guests

• Plan for fun dance floor, table visit, or golden hour group shots

This lets family photo time stay tight and meaningful without feeling overwhelming. I always ask about your VIP’s during our pre planning chat so I know who are the key players in your lives that we want to capture. What groups should I prioritize capturing? Is there a group of people present that we want a group photo with- maybe your college roomates or your coworkers? These are people we can gather at some point during the reception for a big group shot!

Prep Your Family Ahead of Time

Make sure your family members know where and when they’re needed for photos. I recommend:

• Sending a group text 1–2 days before the wedding

• Reminding them to stay nearby after the ceremony

• Sharing the location of family portraits (especially if it's a short walk away)

Clear communication = no delays and confusion!

Tell Me Anything I Should Know

If there are family dynamics, sensitive relationships, or people who shouldn’t be in the same photo, let me know ahead of time. I’ll always approach each grouping with kindness and awareness. Having the full picture helps me:

• Avoid awkward pairings

• Keep the vibe light and respectful

• Capture everyone with genuine joy

Sensitive information like a recent divorce, recent death in the family, strained relationships, etc are all information that I keep top of mind when documenting groups.

Final Thoughts: It’s All About What Matters Most

Your family shot list doesn’t need to be long to be meaningful. It just needs to be you. Let’s focus on the people you love most, the photos you’ll cherish decades from now, and a timeline that flows with ease. And remember—you don’t have to figure this out alone. I’m always here to help build the list, recommend timing, and guide your day with calm, joyful direction.